Are you an Illuminati?

A few days ago, a very good friend of mine called me up and asked me very seriously, "Ali, are you an Illuminati?". I was completely dumbfounded by this question, I asked him, "Why are you asking this?" and he replied in a matter-of-fact way, "Because you are a Rhodes scholar!". I thought he was pulling my leg, but on further inquiry he revealed that he had recently read that Cecil Rhodes was an Illuminati and that all Rhodes scholars are inducted to be made Illuminati members. He had me in stitches, and I pointed out that since Mr. Fulbright was also a Rhodes scholar, did he think that all Fulbrighters were Illuminati, too? He thought for a moment and then said, "Of course! they must be Illuminati too". Just to check up on his conspiracy theories I googled up "rhodes illuminati" and sure enough a lot of links popped up purporting the same ideas, a really fun read was "Oxford University: The Illuminati Breeding Ground". Sure enough, me being an Illuminati became the joke of the week among my friends, the best response that I heard to the joke was from another friend, who simply said, "I don't care if you are a free mason or Illuminati, just send me the membership form, let's partner up!"